Preserving family stories: A guide to capturing loved ones’ memories

The holidays are more than just a time to enjoy delicious meals and exchange gifts. They’re a time to be with family and friends and create new memories.

They’re also a precious opportunity to capture loved ones’ stories and memories while you can.

To ensure these cherished stories aren’t lost to time, consider using the upcoming holidays as the perfect time (maybe even the starting point) to talk with your loved ones and preserve their stories through note-taking, audio recording or video recording.

Whether you’re the interviewer or the interviewee, the following tips can help you or your family begin recording these treasures.

Some people don’t like to talk about themselves. They might not think they’ve had an interesting life. But it’s not about who’s had a jazzy or unusual life. It’s about capturing the unique voice and experiences of an irreplaceable person in your family.

Treasure your loved one’s thoughts and memories about their life — they are truly priceless. Preserving this cornucopia of recollections, along with their wisdom, rich detail of family history, and deeply held values and faith practices are a gift to your family’s future generations.

If a family member is still hesitant, ask them this: “Wouldn’t a story of your parents’ or grandparents’ lives be one of your most cherished possessions?”

Your loved one might prefer setting up a time to talk. Choose a quiet, comfortable place to visit. The lack of background noise makes it easier to pick up your loved one’s voice, which is important for both note-taking and recording.

Or you might find yourselves in the middle of a great conversation that becomes an impromptu interview. That can happen anytime.

Other opportunities? Holidays, birthdays, and family get-togethers, which can be natural backdrops for spontaneous, reflective conversations and reminiscing. If those happen when your family gets together, seize the moment. Grab your notebook or smartphone and start recording that moment in time.

• Document stories through note-taking.

  The simplest way to preserve memories is through good old-fashioned note-taking. Keep a dedicated notebook or use your smartphone or tablet to jot down key points and quotes during your conversations. Be sure to gather the facts, along with emotions and anecdotes that make your loved one’s story so memorable. Transcribe your notes into a digital format to organize and share with family.

• Capture voices with audio recording.

  If you want to preserve the essence of your loved one’s voice, warmth and personality behind every story, consider audio recording your conversations. A digital voice recorder or a smartphone app can do the job. Ask for your loved one’s permission to record them.

• Create video memories.

  To capture not only the voice of your loved one, but also their beautiful face, expressions and body language, opt for video recording with a camera or smartphone.

  (Recording audio and video are great ways to do interviews, but it’s a good idea to also transcribe them so the stories don’t get lost to changing technology.)

From childhood memories to first jobs, military service, marriage and children, the lists of interview topics and questions are nearly endless.

To help you hone in on certain categories your family member might like to talk about, check out https://storycorps.org/participate/great-questions, where you’ll find these questions and more:

• “Can you tell me about the important people in your life?”
• “Who has been the biggest influence on your life? What lessons did that person or those people teach you?”
• “What have been some of the happiest moments in your life? The saddest?”

Don’t forget to ask your loved one to share any photos or memorabilia they may have, which can add depth to the stories.

It’s hard to pick which is more fun: visiting with loved ones while preserving their memories or sharing them. Both are important and rewarding.

Craft a digital treasure trove, an archive filled with these recorded stories. Organize them by themes or family members to make it easier for future generations to access and enjoy. Share the archive with family members through cloud storage or physical copies to ensure the stories remain a part of your family’s legacy.

It would be impossible to get anyone’s life story in one sitting. Keep the conversation going by meeting with your loved one several times — for maybe an hour at a time — for as long as it takes.

If you do use the holiday season as the kickoff for capturing family stories, keep this new tradition alive! Start these carpe diem conversations at holiday and other appropriate gatherings. Encourage different family members to be the interviewer and interviewee each year, ensuring that everyone has a chance to contribute.

As the years go by, your family history archive will grow richer, preserving not only stories but also the bonds that tie your family together.